Getting Personal: Lacy and Darrell
Sophie and I are incredibly excited about today’s episode. This amazing couple reached out to us after listening to our Going Deep episode on our relationship (“Going Deep: Our Story of Infidelity, Sex Addiction, Trust, and Love”) to confide in us and the struggles they’re currently going through as a couple.
This is going to be a new series on the podcast called Getting Personal — because it does not get any more personal than this. The couple shares their struggles to ultimately learn how to connect better and we offer our guidance and hope. We want to show what it is actually like when we sit down with a couple to talk about what they’re going through and help them through their struggles.
We’re hoping to do more of these in the future so send us a message and let us know what you think!
[:34] About our episode today.
[3:48] Relationship tip of the week!
[4:57] Want to experience this? Take a look at our Relationship Workshop.
[7:11] Welcoming the couple to the podcast.
[8:35] Darrell and Lacy introduce themselves and explain why they’re here, talking with us today.
[10:12] How Lacy found out about the affair, and about the beginnings of their relationship.
[14:58] What wasn’t clicking prior to the affair.
[20:48] Darrell’s experience: his side of the affair, prior relationships, and family life.
[24:09] How the affair started and subsequently developed.
[36:10] Lacy’s past experiences: being cheated on and being the cheater.
[39:27] A path to recovery: setting ground rules.
[41:20] Darrell’s experiences that built his ideas of relationships, intimacy, feelings, and sexuality.
[49:00] Exercises and goals for Darrell to improve upon himself and retrain to be different.
[55:00] An exercise for Darrell and Lacy to open their line of communication, podcast and book recommendations, and how to improve your meditating and help it become more effective.
[1:08:08] Safeguards Lacy and Darrell have already put up, as well as our recommendations.
[1:12:59] Our suggestion to the couple: begin practicing radical transparency.
Relationship Tip of the Week
Take a moment and examine your early life experiences and consider what you went through in life that may have contributed to the way that you view relationships in general. When you do that, look at which of those ideas or “lenses” you want to keep, and which ones you want to change.
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